Caring for Alzheimer's

Posts Tagged ‘nursing home’

Assuming a dementia patient can live in a nursing home (correct me if I’m wrong, please), do any specific regulations apply regarding who may be placed in the same room? Or is room assignment within nursing homes based on availability for incoming patients? I am asking these questions specifically in regards to dementia patients. Thank you!

The James L. West Center combined a team of medical and legal professionals to provide information to families and individuals who suspect Alzheimer’s. From Symptoms and Stages to Care Options and what to look for in Residential Care, families can be informed and provide the appropriate care for their loved one

I answered the proposal with, If you dont have a problem with me taking my DYING breath to care for my parents, then YES we can get married, if you have a problem with that, then NO, we do not need to get married. I would care for his parents as well. Well both parents are disabled, one paralyzed where I use lifts, etc., requiring 24/7 care. Last July we bought a house and moved my parents in, my stepdad in a garage, he requires the 24/7 and smokes… My mom upstairs because she is on oxygen 24/7… All was fine til DEC 2010 when my stepdaughter called me a bitch and was never even corrected, as she would threaten to move back to grannys or cut. My husband condoned the behavior as my fault. So, I figured ok, unconditional love… all step children at one time or another will call thier stepparent a B….. at one time or another. In FEB 2011, she called her granny and told a lie on me… five or six weeks went by… One morning, I asked my husband if anyone was planning to correct the issue… He sat without saying anything, like NO nothing was going to be corrected. So, at this point I told him, Well, in this case you cannot blame the child… She learned from the best. He left and went fishing, while fishing… sent me a text that said, I WILL HAVE YOU DIVORCE PAPERS TO SIGN IN TEN DAYS. Nothing else. Well, I am in our house with 2 disabled parents and chose to move my parents back into their home, and had the power and water turned on and had movers the next day move. I moved to, because my stepdad is 24/7 care. So, now… we both decided to work things out… With us both putting in an effort to make things work. My sister has been coming 3 days a week, spending 2 nights so I can spend time with husband. (Only, she is not physically able to get him up or put him to bed, due to neck surgeries.) He has been complaining and saying it is not enough time. He NEVER comes to spend time with me as he feels it all should be at OUR house. Now, he wants me to have my parents in a nursing home… I brought my caregiving to his attention before we married and the ONLY reason we are in separate houses is because of the text he sent where he chose NOT to correct his child for lying. (He is a correctional officer.) His mom was against the marriage before it happened… and I believe he chose not to correct her for any repercution he may get from his mom. Well, the ONLY effort he puts in is he texts me… Never asks me to meet him at the park, get an ice cream, take a ride (as I can usually leave for an hour or so). It is ALL on me to come to OUR house, I personally feel as though he is punishing me for caring for my parents, by not putting any effort towards our marriage. Like I said, I can usually leave for an hour or so, come back, make a quick check and leave again for an hour or so, as long as everything is ok. I have NOT been spending any EXTRA time with him since March, he has put forth NO effort to spend time with me. I know we are deeply in NEED of counseling and he refuses. I was in an 18 year relationship that ended in infidelity and THAT was easier to deal with than to feel like I have to DEFEND taking care of my parent’s everyday for the rest of my life… My heart is aching while trying to remain strong to be able to care for my parents. I love my husband, and my parent’s very much! There is so much more to this… PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE if you took time to read this give me your HONEST opinions!!!!!!!!

I’ve been taking care of my elderly father for about two months. Lately he has become increasingly combative. I have promised him that he wouldn’t end up in a nursing home. Does anyone have any idea home to make things easier for all of us?

I’m really trying to encourage my mom who suffered from a mini-stroke last July to get involved with people. She lives in her own home after having taken care of my dad who has Alzheimers. My dad is in a nursing home but she feels lonely. I see her every day and we go visit my dad every night. Still, it’s not enough for her because she finds the days long. Anyone out there who’s 80 and still active? Just wondering because I need inspiration.
What can she do if she phones her friends for coffee, etc. and they say they’ll call her back but never do because they’re "too busy"? She gets discouraged when that happens.

Would this be ok to have this 2nd home go in to foreclosure? We bought my parents home 5 years ago so they could have money for caregiving/nursing home. We paid 0,000 and mo payments are 00. They lived in it up until 2 years ago, we put the home on the market for 0,000 for quick sale per real estate person, then market fell out, It is on a lake, very nice area, underpriced for other homes, I have been thru 4 realtors, we currently have it for 5,000, no one wants to buy anything regardless of what they say, we tried to rent it and have to evict the tenant, no payments, We have run out of our life savings to try and keep this on the market to sell, We live in Florida the home is in Washington State. The cost of maintaining the home, lawn care, elect, water and sewer runs 0 a month on top of the 00. I do not know what to do anymore, we don’t have any more money to put in something that we don’t use and can’t sell, We own a company – how would this effect us if it forecloses? … HELPFUL ADVISE WOULD BE GREATLY APPRECIATED.

The James L. West Center in Fort Worth, Texas has provided an Educational video on the Signs and Symptoms, Diagnosis, and Care Options for individuals and families facing Alzheimer’s disease or related dementias.

If I tell my father’s lawyer that he is mentally incapaticated, what is the lawyer obligated to do?
My father who is 81 years old is in the process of changing his will for the 3rd time in 5 years. He suffers from OCD and Narcissistic personality disorder and is threatening to cut all 4 of his children out of his will, because we wanted to enroll my 76 year old mother in a day program for people with Alzheimer’s (she was diagnosed 5 years ago).

Due to his personality disorders he views this attempt to get my mother professional care as an attempt to separate her from him (i.e. we are trying to put her in a nursing home). We are only trying to get her some help and some peace as he is very controlling and limits her interactions with her children and others. He verbally abuses her (although she has no control over her condition) and she has called my siblings and myself to "rescue her" from him.

We have even contacted a priest to talk to my father about doing right by my mother. He has had arguments with 3 of his four children in the last week (the 4th hasn’t spoken to him in over a year). I know he is scared about the progression of my mother’s condition and he is lashing out at his children because of fear of the unknown.

So now that you have the back story, if I contact his lawyer (I am at present an executor) and inform him that my father is not of sound mind and my mother has Alzheimer’s and their mental capacities are somewhat comprised, can he legally make any changes to their will once he has this information?

I know it’s long-but thank you for taking the time ….
51 minutes ago – 4 days left to answer.
Additional Details
Due to his personaility disorders, he does not see himself as having a problem, he will not go voluntarily to be evaluated.

Its a long story so ill try to keep it short, shortly after moving in my house this guy that lives down the street from me came by to introduce himself and welcome me to the neighborhood, anyways we became good friends over a period of 6 months, he would stop by and give me Compliments on the shelving in my garage and he wanted to do the same thing but he didn’t have the money for it, along with other things he wanted to do, well one day he stop over to tell me his dad is 92 and he lives in CA and he thinks his dad has Alzheimer’s and he wanted to move his dad in to his place so he could take care of him rather putting his dad in a nursing home, I asked my friend how can you take care of him if your working, he said his girlfriend lives with him and she would take care of his dad but she wanted to be paid for it, so my friend asked me if 00, a month is unreasonable to charge his dad for the care, I told him I don’t think so but I asked him how are you going to get paid, he said his dad is worth over million dollars and his dad has one hundred and ninety thousand dollars in his checking account and his dad would just sign checks and my friend would write out the check amount to him self for cash, I told him he should get a lawyer because the way your doing this may not be legal, well anyways he didn’t take my advice, now with in the last two months he bought a new truck and all new furniture and appliances and got his garage all done and had air conditioning installed in the garage, the other day he stopped over, we talked a little and I asked him, all this stuff you been buying is it your dads money that payed for it, he said yea but dad has more money then he knows what to do with, I asked him if his dad knows how much your writing the checks out for, he no, then I asked him if his dad has a Will, he said I think so, he said he thinks it all gos to his dads sister and he thinks he should get what he can before his sister gets it all.

My father who is 81 years old is in the process of changing his will for the 3rd time in 5 years. He suffers from OCD and Narcissistic personality disorder and is threatening to cut all 4 of his children out of his will, because we wanted to enroll my 76 year old mother in a day program for people with Alzheimer’s (she was diagnosed 5 years ago).

Due to his personality disorders he views this attempt to get my mother professional care as an attempt to separate her from him (i.e. we are trying to put her in a nursing home). We are only trying to get her some help and some peace as he is very controlling and limits her interactions with her children and others. He verbally abuses her (although she has no control over her condition) and she has called my siblings and myself to "rescue her" from him.

We have even contacted a priest to talk to my father about doing right by my mother. He has had arguments with 3 of his four children in the last week (the 4th hasn’t spoken to him in over a year). I know he is scared about the progression of my mother’s condition and he is lashing out at his children because of fear of the unknown.

So now that you have the back story, if I contact his lawyer (I am at present an executor) and inform him that my father is not of sound mind and my mother has Alzheimer’s and their mental capacities are somewhat comprised, can he legally make any changes to their will once he has this information?

I know it’s long-but thank you for taking the time ….
Due to his personaility disorders, he does not see himself as having a problem, he will not go voluntarily to be evaluated.